Once upon a time, someone asked me, "What would it take for you to open yourself fully to another? As in no walls at all."
I answered something to the likes of, "A great feeling of trust like no other."
However, when you knowingly open yourself fully - you also open yourself to a possibly great amount of hurt.
It's like allowing yourself to free-fall based on nothing but faith that you will land softly. On the flip side, there may be nothing but an endless abyss. Yet you take that risk by taking the free-fall.
And it really is hard to pick yourself up when you feel that a trust that you have given fully takes a knock and cracks begin to form around it. Mending those cracks is a lot of hard work.
Does one ever regret decisions made due to feelings of guilt or obligation?
I know that every time I make a decision under such circumstances, I end up taking a very wrong and painful road. I've learnt that decisions made in such situations means to make a decision against what is right for myself... and collecting scars along the way.
I learnt to fully trust my gut feeling and instinct. They have never failed me. The moment I doubt it and go against it... that's when things tend to take a long detour.
I learnt not to focus on a "what-if" that is a future negative because it feels like I'm setting things up to fail even before giving it a go. The glass has to be half full and I believe that effort needs to be made to ensure that it remains half full.
I was told that some of the things that I do is very big of me, because I am making choices that may not necessarily result in what I would like to have... and quite possibly result in the opposite of it. It's hard to do that but it is also the best gift that I can bestow on the people I care about.